Fall 2012 New York Fashion Week Fall 2012 Trends According To... Me

New York Fashion Week has come and gone faster than that time scrunchies almost happened again (and thank Wang they didn't). Now everyone can stop being like "OMG I'M SOOOOOO STRESSSSSEEEED OUT ABOUT FASSSSSSSIHON WEEK" and get back to being like "OMG I'M SOOOOOO STRESSSSSEEEED OUT ABOUT FASSSSSSSIHON." Oh... sweet, sweet first world privilege! Some people have no filtered water or iodine, others simply have no time to get down to Milk and back to Lincoln Center! THE HORROR.

Anyway, a lovely young journalist at Columbia University's Uptown Radio program asked me to do some guest commentary about the top trends and themes at New York Fashion Week this season. (Here's where you can listen to my fashion week commentary.) So, here's a slightly more in-depth look at all of the cool shit that headed down the runways and will be eventually making its way into magazine spreads and, in a more pedestrian way, onto the racks and backs of regular, garden-variety scrubs like you and definitely like me.

+ MENSWEAR: Overall, there was very little cutesy or stock sexiness going on at fashion week. Sure, it's fall, but everyone was uniformly either very covered up, very buttoned up, and very tailored. Basically, we're becoming a nation of austere puritans where women dress like men but also get to be vixen-ish femme fatales at the same time, like at Jason Wu, St. John, Donna Karan, Michael Kors, and Vivienne Tam. Menswear in all of its various gender-bending iterations was all over that runway in a very '40s way with peplum kicks or noir-ish baggy, louche silhouettes.

Jason Wu, Donna Karan, Vivienne Tam

+ METALLICS: Stunning metallics, especially at Badgley Mishcka, where they did '20s-inspired'80s metallics SO so right. Alexandre Herchcovitch's golds glowed. And that luminous, Chrysler Building-inspired silver Michael Kors gown!!

Prubul Gurung, Badgley Mischka, Michael Kors

+ CRAZY COLLARS: Marc Jacobs, Catherine Malandrino, Vivienne Tam, Ohne Titel, Altuzarra, Rachel Roy, Reed Krakoff, Thom Browne and Badgley Mischka all popped crazy collars, from mysterious, exaggerated turtlenecks that impeded models' eyesight, to creations fashioned out of former furry creatures to Anne Boleyn-chic Baroque collars. And speaking of Baroque, that leads me to...

Rachel Roy, Ohne Titel, Vivenne Tam, Reed Krakoff

+ CRAZY COSTUMES: Dramatic, nostalgia costumes ruled at Marc Jacobs (the most dramatic, fanciful show of the season), Norma Kamali, and OH Marchesa!

+ COLOR TRENDS: Elie Tahari's blues are definitely the new black. Ravishing reds ruled at Zac Posen, Thakoon, Charlotte Ronson, Norma Kamali, Monique Lhuillier, Sophie Theallet, Gary Graham, Chris Benz, Donna Karan, L'Wren Scott and Michael Kors. (Guess I'm gonna have to figure out how to wear red. I'm thinking I need red jeans to pair with a peach top.)

Michael Kors, Creatures of the Wind, Monique Lhullier, Norma Kamali

 + CELESTIAL PRINTS: Smoky, psychedelic digital prints at Brood, Nicole Miller, Michael Angel, Cynthia Rowley, Mandy Coon and Calla.

+ TOO-COOL-FOR-SCHOOL GIRL: Creatures Of The Wind (OMG my favorite collection) J. Crew, Marc By Marc Jacobs, Tory Burch (obviously), Betsey Johnson ideated and iterated on prep school-chic.

Marc By Marc Jacobs, Betsey Johnson, Creatures of the Wind, Michael Kors

+ Overall favorite fall 2012 collections: Creatures of the Wind, Michael Kors, St. John, Norma Kamali. (Favorite beauty: Zac Posen, Prabal Gurung, Anna Sui!)

What were your fashion week faves?

* Credit all photos: Style.com

Rachel Roy's Fashion Week Presentation Totally Eclipsed By Kim Kardashian

I took some time out of my busy week of not really going to fashion week by going to fashion week and checking out Rachel Roy's Spring Summer 2012 presentation on the promenade of Avery Fisher Hall at Lincoln Center. The promenade is basically an outdoor balcony where you can smoke before going inside to try to pretend you know what opera actually means. But this morning it was the neutral-hued backdrop of the human stick figure diorama that was Rachel Roy's presentation. (Just kidding, the models were just "regular-skinny," and they were a far more diversely cast group than some of the other shows I've seen this fashion week.)

Soooo, Rachel Roy's presentation was lovely! Themed "romantic minimalism," the collection was an exercise in hushed louche walking pants, slouchy blazers and the occasional Mandarin collar. Very Charlie Girl meets "The Joy Luck Club" meets for Sunday brunch near Central Park. Oh, and Bobbi Brown pulled off some of the best beauty I've seen since this whole fashion week situation happened. The perfect "I'm-not-wearing-any-makeup" makeup. But that's because she's Bobbi Brown and knows what the eff she's doing.

 + Read more about Rachel Roy's S/S 2012 presentation after the jump!

And then, about three minutes in, the wheels fell off of the entire operation because Kim Kardashian showed up and all hell quietly broke loose. I'm pretty sure everyone forgot there was a presentation taking place... BECAUSE KIM KARDASHIAN WAS THERE! IN THE FLESH! Well... I think she has human flesh. I'm not sure. She was standing RIGHT behind me (get it? BEHIND? Because she's KNOWN FOR HER BUTT!), and I've seen her before at work events, but usually in the dark. This was my first time seeing her in broad daylight. It felt more like an alien spotting than a celebrity spotting. She looks like a buxom fembot. Her eyelashes were about the length of my actual hair, and it's possible that she was sewn into her cinch-waist dress, which looks like it was designed only for standing, not sitting. Barely even for walking. The kind of dress Madonna often wears to remind people she's British now. Oh, and her wedding ring looks heavier than a silver tea service.

The photographers who'd been busy photographing the models and taking a few atmosphere shots completely heel turned, ignoring the collection -- you know, the actual fashion -- to photograph Kim, who may or may not be able to move her face. (Also, she had her hair in a very high bun, and I could see the indentation of her weave in the back. That clue made me lean more toward the "human" than alien side of the Kim Kardashian human v. alien debate.) It wasn't one of those noisy paparazzi swarms -- fashion week is FAR too sophisticated for that, dearies -- but it was more like the softer side of "holy shit." Even the models, trained to pretty much blank-stare out into nothingness, began subtly transmitting rapid eye movements to each other -- morse code for "HOLY SHIT, IT'S FUCKING KIM FUCKING KARDASHIAN!"

I think Kim was with one of her sisters -- the one who always wears pussy bows? -- but IDFK because I really don't keep up with the Kardashians. Too many of them! And I have "more classier" shit to watch, like "Millionaire Matchmaker."

Anyway, Kim Kardashian came, she saw, and it was almost kind of a shame because it seemed like NO ONE paid one second's worth of attention to Rachel Roy collection, which was very mature and worldly. I know that celebs at your show = mad attention (and hey, it's working, because here I am blogging about it), but all I heard on the way out were murmurs like "... was absolutely SQUEEZED into that dress" and "... that much makeup? I'd simply rather die!" (I ACTUALLY HEARD THAT EXACT LINE UTTERED! THAT'S NOT HYPERBOLE OR POETIC LICENSE) instead of, say, how Rachel Roy's black cropped pants are the platonic ideal of flattering pants.

Kim Kardashian and maybe-Kardashian left the Rachel Roy show, did "a walk" outside of Lincoln Center and then disappeared down into the train station at Columbus Circle. JK about that last bit! Kim Kardashian probably has no idea what a train is or what it does!

So, aside from Missoni For Target, that was my fashion week! How was yours?

Milla Jovovich Continues To Win At Being Beautiful

Milla Jovovich, seen here at the Schumacher show at Berlin Fashion Week, continues to own being beautiful. I need to unlock the secret to having the kinda wet-look bun that falls halfway between tousled and "done." Oh wait. The secret is having a beauty team. Sigh.

I hereby dedicate DJ Khaled's screamo-Tuned "All I Do Is Win (Remix)" (also my current theme song/ motto) to Milla's perpetual win.